When it comes to figuring out what Old Man Winter is up to on any given day, precise temperature readings are no substitute for the indicators that our own bodies provide.
As a little kid, I automatically assumed that it got painfully cold outside as soon as the thermometer dropped even one degree below zero. Only later did I come to realize that, once you’re out in the elements, 2 above doesn’t really feel any different from 2 below.
In other words, using the zero mark on the thermometer as some sort of demarcation between a tolerable level of cold and something far worse is a bit arbitrary. Far more useful is the body’s infallible cold classification system, which is based on broad categories of cold rather than degree-by-degree variations.
Under the body’s cold classification system, any situation you encounter outdoors during the winter months falls into one of the following, instantly recognizable, categories: unseasonably warm, pleasant, nippy, chilly, cold, very cold, wicked cold, friggin’ cold, bone-chillingly cold, “why do I live in this forsaken place?” cold, and “I can’t feel my extremities anymore!” cold.
Finally, there’s the coldest classification of them all, the one that could permanently relieve you of your interest in winter temps forever. By killing you. That could be called “I'm so tired I think I’ll just sleep in this snowbank for a while" cold.
No thermometer needed.
No comments:
Post a Comment